Three months ago I was....

Yep. That's right. It's been 3 months. Almost. Three months ago right
now I was just about ready to die. And. Also. Believed I might. That
pain is but a distant memory now. Praise God!
But my little guy is not so little anymore.
He actually rather giant like.
Our recient achievements have included rolling over ( my this I mean
he's actually doing it more consistantly now..... He began this last
month)
Grabbing things and putting them in his mouth.
Keeping his hands in his mouth.
Always. Always with the slobbery hands in the mouth.
Having the strenth to sit up by himself.... Though we are wobbley.
New sounds
A facination with food
A new cry quite unlike
The little baby cry that is.....how shall I say.... Very
annoying...and henceforth....very effective)
No more wobbley head

He's quite the little man now. Very very sure of himself as well.
We love him.
But.
Who wouldn't
He's pretty awesome.

A society raised on lies

Overthe last year I have pretty much only blogged about pregnancy and
babies. And while that is pretty much the theme of my life..... I do
still have a mind which I on occation use.
Lately I've come across some pretty interesting and some pretty gross
things involving childhood education and indoctrination. First being a
post from this blog which I posted on facebook ( http://stewartspeak.com/
) talking about the book " why mommy is a democrat" and how they
save the world. Democrats aren't satans minions. But really. This is
crap.
Second:
I had a conversation with my mother (who is a teacher currently
teaching my old preschool /kindergarten class back in Idaho) who was
telling me of some fourth grade material on "safe homosexual sex" with
illustrated how-tos on fisting. Really. First of all... O MY GOSH! I
do not and would never want my fourth grader hearing these things.
But..... I refuse to be dumb. I know that fourth graders are more
informed and exsperianced at their age than I probably was at 16.
( sad) but really. Who gets of thinking it's okay to teach any child
of any age this stuff. And that it's the schools place to do so.
Crap
Crap
Crappity crap.
I am a parent now.
So I can say this with ferver.
I'll be damned if I let the world indoctrinate my son in this way.
Period.

...side effects...

Tubes.
Still.
Weak.
Still.
Starving.
Still.
On couch.
Still.
Now.
Mastitis.
What's one more.
Ahh.
I can't win.

My hospital journey.....

I have been gone.
I know.
Here's why.
Wednesday and Thursday mornin I was gearing up for company coming.
All our family was coming up for what was suppose to be Jadens Baby
detication at church today.
My parents come from Idaho.
My inlaws and sister-in-law came up from Yakima. They are currently
staying at my other sister-in-laws house.
Friday was lovely.....
UNTIL........
We got takeout from brown latern.
I got a Chicken sandwhichand some
Fries(<-triggers attacts try tell me) z. I got chicken because I had
indeed slowly began transitioning back to a vegan diet. To feel
better. My body liked it. But by gollie those turkey sandwhiches were
nice during pregnancy.
Anyway.
Sidetracked.
Sorry.
Small chest pain immediately after dinner.
Not worried.
Had major acid reflux during pregnancy.
Since My son was born I had had 3 other episodes of pain like this. I
began attributing it to has that got
Stuck in my tummy. Babies do in fact rearrange your insides. No.fun.
Those episodes of pain had usually lasted about 30 minutes.
They.
Were.
HORRID.
I would liken them to labor pains. It felt like a contraction in my
rib cage that never let go .
Anyway.
It happened this time.
Only THIS time it
WOULDN'T STOP!!!!!!!
Hours went by.
Luckily baby was sleepy.
I only had to feed him once.
It started at about 8pm.....
It persist.
Then came bathroom time.
I did
Everything you can imagine in there.
( well I guess that's how demented you are...maybe not everything)
Came to the hospital at about 4am
They think it's my gallblatter.
Get nausia and pain meds.
They are good.
No....great.
Ultrasound time.
Very strange to have an ultrasound and NOT be looking at baby.
Gallstones.
Lots of them.
Little ones.
The kinds that travel places.
They told
Me if it worked it's way into a certain area.....that that pain would
be 10x worse AND it would be uncurable. I'd live with it for the rest
of my life.
I did not like this option.
After some tears and deliberation.
They immediately scheduled my surgery.
Went in at 1.....
Don't remember passing out.
Last thing I remember I was talking to the nurse about being able to
see my gallblatter. I like
That sorta thing.
I came out at 2:30
Woke up at 3:30
Back to the room by 4:30
Jon is much better now.....I think he was a wreck.....though we will
not admit it.
So...I saw it. It was packed with little stones.
I believe them now.
My gallblatter was also much smaller than I would Have though.
Odd.
They were se naughty little stones that made their way towards my
intestines. They are stuck. That is why i vomit up all my food. Have
to go for a second proceedure at a different hospital today...
(hopfully) sometime.
They go down through my mouth to
Flush them out.
Yay.
Not so thrilled.
I gag.
So I stopped taking my morphine. Didn't think
It did a whole lot.

Have sething like Motron for pain....bit it made me throw up....so
then they gave me anti nausia meds.
Which didn't really help.
So I stopped that too.
I am now just on a fluid iv.
It hurts but.....
I'd rather deal with that then the side effects.
Also.
I'm
Pumping.
Or
Trying to.
But you don't make much milk when u have no water and no food!!!!!
So.....poor guys getting formula too.
He LOVES it I'm told. Not happy about that bit I am glad he's eating.
And it's okay since I can't feed him much now.
But.
Bottom line.
I HATE that my babys getting fed out of a can.... And that I can feed
him now.
I pumped a full bottle this morning.
Last pump was about 1 1/2 oz:(
Hospital pumps work better though.
So anyway.
Im soooo thirsty
I only get ice.
Next I get to DRINK water
Then juice.
Then jello
Then broth....which I
Will live
On this week most likely.
The low
Fat to a NO FAT diet for the next two months.
Low fat for the rest of my life.
And very small meals. Always.
No thanksgiving for me:)
Guess I am destined to be a veggie/vegan:)
Thank you frenchfries.
I hate you.

Day three

This is a sad excuse for blog.
But it has been a very. Bad. Day.
The small wonder is sick.
Very cranky.
Very clingy.
Very needy.
Hmmmm.
I'm tired.
Company tomorrow.
my parents are coming for the baby detication on Sunday.
Need to clean the house.
But when.
Ouch.
My head.
Goodnight.
Sleep would be nice.
But...
Alas.
It is unlikely.

Day two

Well I made two so far...
Perhaps that's it.
So yesterday cont.....

My darling child would NOT nap yesterday.... He finally took his first
nap since 9am at 245pm. Yeah. Cranky. No doubt.
My eye dr appt was at 345.....so I had to wake him up twenty minutes
before. Now he's hungry...even though he ate 30 minutes ago..he has
since then slept...and is now hungry.
Now I put him in in his car seat.
To say he hates this is an understatement. He loaths this.you see... I
do not have one of these children that fall asleep when the car starts
going. No. He screams.... Forever. The only way he calms sown is if we
are on the freeway for more than 30 minute. He likes going fast. So
this will come in handy when we travel for holidays.... But not
everyday.
So he screamed.
We got there.
He screamed.
Jon was late at relieving me.
So the nice eye people stalled and allowed me to feed him.
Jon came.
More screaming.
From my son not jon.
But alas time for eye exam.
My eye doctor talks fast.
He is very informative.
But a fast talker.
He told me I have abnormally large eyeballs.
He said it was not a compliment.
I'm evidently just a freak of nature.
I also have many lil quirky things in my eyes that are very
uncommon.:..especially for those of us not ordering off of the SC menu.
He told me my eyes were worse.
I knew that.
That is in fact why we were there.
Duh.
He also told me my left eye is slowly becoming nonfuctional......as a
result I should exspect to be legally blind ..( if not entirely
blind)....later in life. We do not know when. Yay.
Thus is not uncommon.
My aunt is legally blind in the exact same eye.

On another note.
My son.
Quite unhappy this week.
Dunno.

Uh...

Already a day late

Someone....who does not even read my blog.....challenged me to write a
blog every day this month. Now...we all know that us not going to
happen....really
But
I.....SHALL.....TRY.
I suppose.
The problem being....I don't think I have that much to write about....

Today is Monday. I hate Mondays. See it is possible to not have to get
up, get ready then drive to work and STILL hate Mondays. I hate it
cause one the weekends my husbands home, we see people, do things, or
even just stay home and cuddle on the couch watching movies. On
Mondays....jon goes back to work and my other life starts. Now...I am
not so insecure that I need social interaction 24/7......that's not
it.....what it is......
This means jon works then comes home for dinner....and you see....my
husband is blessed with the gift of sleep. A superpower really. This
enables him to fall asleep ANYWHERE....at ANYTIME....almost
instantly...and sleep HARD and sleep LONG! This isn't his fault
really...he was actually genetically predisposed to this. If you've
never seen a Lentsch in their natural habbitat...you connot fully
comprehend this.(In becoming a Lentsch....sadly.... I did not inherit
this superpower)
That being said I shall not see my husband till Saturday afternoon....
And a week is a long time to go without grownup interaction.
I shall miss sanity till then ...

Meanwhile...I spend day after day with the second most lovable guy in
my life. He has discovered...as every boy does....the joys of passing
gas......and always ends a good round with a large smile and a
rambling of happy sounds which cannot at this time be dubbed as
laughing or talking....but very happy none the less.
Boys...
Also...in efforts to speak my son has formed a very peculiar way of
trying..... He sucks air in really hard to talk instead of letting it
out like normal people. It sounds something like....."gaaaaaa-----
aaaiirrrreeeee"
Not unlike his cry for food....
"hhuuunnnngggggeeee"

It's quite comical really.

Today I go for an eye exam...since being pregnant totally distroyed
what little I had left of my vision.
I shall like to see again
Now I'll once again be able to read signs while I drive .
However my husband may not be home like we planned...which means I may
be taking my grumpy child with me. I have no idea how that's going to
go down...
Stand by

A rainy day on the west coast...

The wind is calmly blowing through the trees causing them to lose
their clothing leaf by leaf.
The fallen are now rather wet, causing them to stick to my pant legs
as I walk through them. It is fall and it is beautiful....mostly.
This Lovely autumn stroll is not pleasure jaunt outside......but
rather a dutiful walk through my back yard on which I gather the nasty
little remnants of my furry "children"
So as beautiful...this fall business....but I was reminded of one
small yet important fact.
Leaves fall on top of poo...and then the rain falls . This keep those
little nuggets fresh and ....aaa..... Moist and otherwise very sticky
for things like shoes...more specifically...mine.
Ahhhh autumn!

**squish**

....

Good morning Wednesday, is that you? Pardon me Wednesday, you looked
the same as Tuesday, and also remarkably like Monday. Hmmm.
If you had told me a month ago that I would still be redoing on the
couch, that my child would still be just as fussy, and would have not,
to date, slept anywhere but on people. I may have cried. I may still
cry.
It is true, you can not claim "tired" until you have had a
newborn .... There have been days where I forget my childs name or
call him bentley...(our dogs name)... Not because I forget my sons
name...oh no... Simply because my brain is so far gone that really,
I'm lucky to come up with any name at all.
I feel like the crazy cat lady from the simpsons.....and at
times...look remarkably like her as well!
Many people have been asking me as of late when it is I plan on
returning to work. Hah! Right! As if I have even had the time or brain
power to think of such things! Simply put... I am so not ready and
intend not to be ready till next year. That being said I will be
finding a job in which my son may accompany me. Hard yes. Impossible
no. Having worked in a daycares and ECEC's, I would neversend my child
to one if I didn't have to! That being said, I admire those who
return to work after 6 weeks of maternity leave. Not because I envy
you, oh no, it's because I realized what a truely crazy thing it is.
If I would have still been employed at my last job I would have
actually gone back to work this week. I am SO glad I didn't have to.
Now please don't get me wrong...there is a difference between needing
and wanting to go back to work. So basically I'm saying...is 6 ( or
whatever) weeks are up and u detest having to return to prebaby life
already, your okay by me.
Jaden has come to REFUSE his pacifier now....after we had such a love
for it....AND after such tramatic life events have happened that
warranted it's use more than ever. Instead though, my son has resorted
to fist sucking or more often, forearm sucking. This is very loud and
juicy, and leaves faint hicky marks on his arm. A skill I'd rather he
not yet aquire.
Okay...
There was more was going to say...but appearently my mind is hiding it
from me....it does playvtjose silly games often now.
So for now....
THE END

Thoughts....

I've been told many times in the past that is pretty common that
bigger babies are never full. That they will eat and eat and
eat........ Almost consistantly....... All day.
Well........
Now I see that is true.
My son loves to eat....... Loves it. He does it well and he does it
often. We are able to tell the difference now between "I want boobie"
and "I NEED boobie" in his pleas......
But the "I need" comes often.
It's okay
My body is trying to keep up.
But...... There is something he does that makes
Up for those bellows of hunger.
Every time he eats he intertwines his fingers and crosses his arms on
his chest just below his chin.
Its so stinking cute

Sleep.

True,sleep has been lacking greatly in our lives. And that has more or
less sucked. Because......
Nit only is it sleep depervation.....BUT...... A very angry screaming
little boy.
For hours....
Especially in the hours between 1-4 am
We hate gas.
Alas...
The last two nights...
No screams.....
No gas.....
Just happy sleeping baby:)
Which means.....
Happy sleeping mommy
And happy sleeping daddy....
It's a win win win.
Thank you God!

The story.....

Okay so some people have asked for the low down as far as the birth
goes......and right now I'm riding in the car with a sleeping baby who
loves his car seat(praise God) .... So I actually have two hands:)

Okay so it all started last Sunday night (9/13) ..... I started to
feel very sick and feverish.... Lucky for me I was at church and
having to be social...ugh.
Went home and crawled into bed at about 10:30....
Woke up at 12:30am with bad contractions..... Though still
tollerable..... At this point they were about 15 minutes apart so I
could fall asleep in between.....
About 1:30 I started having a bloody show.....( lovely baby thing I
know)
Contractions continued..... Harder and closer together..... However at
this point I'm still in total denial....... After all it could be
hours or it could be days.... So why get your hopes up. Jon went to
work at 6:30 on the agreement that I call the midwife at 8. At this
point contractions are about 6-8 minutes apart.
Called midwife.... She laughed and said to get to the birthing center
asap. I tested possitive for GBS so I needed my IV.
So.... I called jon and he came home right away. And then my worst
fear happened...( well my worst fear at this point in time) my
contractions totally stopped cause I got excited. Ugh
They checked me at the hospital still only 1 cm and 80%.
So they made me walk for an hour to see if I progressed at all
....or they tried until the fire drill started and we were locked in
the triage room ...( needless to say it's hard to get any walking done
in a 4x4 room)
Fire alarm stopped
We walked in the halls for 5 minutes....
I layed back down.....
She prepped to check me.....
And WHOOPS!!!!! My water broke right there on the table..... And
so.... Even though they would have sent me home home for lack of real
substantial progress.... They now had to keep me and start gbs
treatment.
My contractions picked up again and stayed about 4 minutes apart but
got much mire intense and lasted about 1 1/2 minutes.
I LOVED the day shift nurses.... They rocked. My triage nurse I knew
from a womens retreat with our church..... I loved her. My replacement
Nurse/ lactation consultant was the most wonderful person. She was
totally supportive with us..... She said the reason she did her jon
was because of people like us who wanted to do everything naturally.
Okay so iv time.... They put me on fluids too. I'm a hard draw so this
took two nurses then a specialist to find anything.
My parents are currently speeding down i90 from idaho hoping to make
it on time.... They did.....around 730pm.
It started getting really hard right after that..... On a pain scale
I'd say about a 9..... Just because later..... The really painful part
is sooo far past describable pain that on a scale of 1 to 10..... It's
about a 120!!!
Hmmm.... K so I went in the bath......ugh.....it was nice for a while.
Cold though.
Didn't last long ......I spent most of my time in my hands and
knees.... It was the most comfortable I could be...,either that or
standing up.
Around 9 pm I was starting to lose my mind.
They started to be concerned about his heartrate and continually
monitored him with the fetal monitor...... Damn things wouldn't stay
and the nurse fussed with it constantly .( new shift of nurses
now..... I hated them)

Tried the tub again...... This is about when I hit the NAP
stage.....things calmed down a little and I fell asleep between
contractions .
And then.....
I Had to push......NOW!!!!!
But they wouldn't let me...... They told me to "breath through it" and
not push for over 2 hours.....
That....was hands down....the worst pain I have ever felt in my life.
They becamed very concerned with his size at this point....his head
was also slightly cocked so he was having a hard time coming down. I
never did stop pushing like they told me to....I couldn't . Funny
thing is that the nurse kept saying "don't push....but whatever your
doing....it's working ". Hah! I WAS pushing! Dumb nurse
Once they finally let me push it was another two hours..... His heart
rate went crazy and theynput an internal fedal monitor on his head...
I hated that..... But..... Whatever
Something horrid about seeing something screwed into your babies head.
They started threatening c-cection now cause try didn't think he would
fit..... That pissed me off and with what sanity I had left ( which
mind you wasn't hardly any.... I couldn't speak or really move at this
point.... Just scream.) I cried out to God....asking him to just let
my baby be okay and that I could do this. And then He made it
possible.......
Then they were worried about bad tearing ..... Which I did but didn't
have to get cut....
Then they were worried about his shoulders breaking..... They didn't.
And then...... Pushing was over( mind you pushing was the best part of
the whole thing..... So not as painful as contractions!!!!)
They told me to reach down and pull out my baby..... I really didn't
think I'd actually have to pull... But I did.......
My child was huge! I was shocked!! They kept saying "oh he's not that
big" and I kept saying " look at his hands! He IS huge"
He was beautiful.... Well to me...... His poor little head was
sooosqjished and bruised from the journey.......and he had the most
vernix I have ever seen on a baby......i actually left hand prints on
his back.....
So there was my little man.....Jaden Ray Lentsch
Born at 4:20 am.... Yes 4:20....September 15th, 2009
He was huge...9lb 9oz. 21 1/2 inches
38cm head...... Yeah38!!!!! And you only dialate to 10! Yeah! I do
feel a bit of pride having done it 100% natural:)

He is sooo beautiful and I love him so very very much....
I also love my husband more than ever.... There is no way I could have
done it without him.... No way! And to see him be a father to our son
is incredible......
God has blessed me with a wonderful little family.
Since then it's been rough...... Getting into things with my nocturnal
baby:) but every day gets a little better and we get a bit more sleep.
The moral of the story.....
It sucked but it was all worth it!
I'm in love:)

A mommy.....?.........huh

Well it's real!
He's here.
The most beautiful little miracle I have ever seen!
It still has not totally set in that he's mine though....
Wow......
I'm in love

Due date #2

Here we are...
September 10th, 2009....
No baby still of course....
That's okay though.
I called the hospital yesterday to double check who the midwife on
call this week is..... And it is indeed Dr. Evil.
So I am perfectly content to wait till Monday for baby to make his way
out..... And from there we have two weeks before she is on again.
My favorite midwife is on call the 16th- 20th..... So next weekend
would be great:)
If we go off this due date ( and the average length of pregnancy being
41weeks + 1 day) then next friday should be the day.... That would be
nice.
However
Next week (the 16th) is our anniversary......... Which is a day we
don't want him to arrive on........... But seeing as how stubborn he
seems already.... It wouldn't surprise me:)
I am okay with going into labor on Wednesday though:)

So yep.... Waiting till Monday at least I hope.....

We shall fall into Dr. Evil's grasp!

The check up (and midwife) from hell....

Okay so want the story? Here goes...

Today was my 38 week appointment. Theyblasr few have gone great and I
was exspecting this one to be the same. I was meeting with
Lynnette.... One of the three midwives..... Who is usually always
pretty nice.
The three of them differ greatly.....
Lynnette is the short and curt one.... Very to the point but no real
bedside manor....
Mary is the bubbly grandma type who skirts around questions as to not
get herself in trouble..... Her bedside manor is pretty good
And Natalie.... My favorite..... Who is right in the middle of those
two..... Will tell me the truth and respect me at the same time.... I
LOVE her!!!
Needless to say she is the one i've seen the least.... Of course

So I get there today and was taken right back..... Good blood pressure
AND I've
Leveled out on the weight gain....finally! ( that makes final count 48
lbs gained since December ......ugh)
Waited for her....
Waited
Waited.....
She opens the door with a "oh hi..... It's you...hmmmm"
"What the hell does that mean?" I'm thinking?!?!?
She asked me how I'm doing.....
And interupted me before I could answer.....
She said " your done aren't you"
( this is a question that they all ask and then chew u out if u tell
the truth)
Of course I said yes....
I got
Lectured

She asked how things were.....
I Told her all that's been happening...
She lectured me that "that's all normal"
I said "yeah I know..... That's why your hearing about it now.... Not
a week ago"
My other midwife
Told
Me
To tell lynnette to check me..... Cause they want to keep an eye in me
cause I'm measuring big...
She butched sooo much about this.... Then I got in trouble...
She threw the sheetnon my lap and told me to get on the table....
First measurement: 40 1/2 cm
Same really
Heartbeat: 140...just fine
"spread your legs"
*WHAM!!!"
She
Pushes full force on my legs....
"OUCH"
Complains and mumbles to herself about how rediculous this check is...
:::::::::TMI moment here::::::
She gloved up and off we go...
( mind u I had this dine last week by a different calmer pleasanter
person... And it didn't hurt at all!!!!! It's a little different when
there's anger behind those fingers!!!!)
It frickin hurt!
Then she was mad cause I was tense..... I told her it was becuase she
was being rough!
She said my cervix was to high To reach
..... Facinating I though.... Since it want last week for the chick
with shorter fingers! Maybe my body is running away from u!!!

She tried a sweep... Well she said she I'd but I don't see how.....
She only attempted for about 1/2 a second.....

She
Mumbled to herself
Then began pushing down HARD on my babies head to make him lower.
I hates this.
Baby really hated this.
I told her to stop
She barked right back that it was my fault vise I told her to check
me....
Well hello... No... I didn't
I was more dialated..... Don't know effacemen or station cause I wa to
busy trying to rescue myself.

She looked at our
Birthplan...... Complained about everything on it....
I asked what was wrong...
She said nothing.... It was just a waste of time cause they did/
didn't do all those things anyway.
I politely said I didn't care... Unwanted it On paper.

I Said thank you ask she left....
She grunted and said "yeah"..... And left

I pulled
Myself
Back together and tried hard not to cry........ Cause I don't cry......
Until I got to the car at least:)

Moral of the story...... Jaden can't come this weekend cause she is on
call.... I think.
And I DONT want to have anything to do with her anymore.
And if I have to go to my appointment on the 29th (oh God please
noooo!!!) I am changing my appointment..... I will not see her again.

Goodbye Lynnette G.
Wish I could say it's been pleasant....but.....

Grr...

I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'm done
I'M DONE BEING PREGNANT PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

37 week check up... Yes more baby stuff

Okay so today was my 37 week check up. It went better than exspected.
There were ups and downs however.

DOWN: I failed my GBS test..... So iv and early hospital run for me...
Woohoo..... I'm not worried about it though. Even though I rather not
have to.... I'd rather my baby no get sick. So it's totally worth it.

Ups: though they usually don check u till 39 or 40 weeks my midwife
wanted to check my progress because I am measuring 40 weeks and we
know the baby is engaged and big....
So she did....
I am only 1cm so no big whoop there....
But I'm 50% effaced and between a -2 and -1 station.
She said they didn't want me to go to 40 weeks if we can help it
because he's big and they wanna make sure he can fit! Nice words to
hear from ur midwife I know.
She said she seriously doubts I'll make it that long...... But If I
did I may have to be induced.
She also said she wouldn't be surprise if she saw me this weekend:)
So ........ I am taking it all with a grain of salt.......
But I must admit I am still happy to know we r making some progress.
Come baby come.... Any time:)

10/20 days

Okay so we passed due date #1 given by the midwives now on to two and
three......
Ugh
Baby..... Any time is good.....really!
Anyway
We helped our friends move yesterday afternoon. I hate moving but it
is much better with lotsof ppl I admit!
We came home with an evening to spare..... And so a walk was desided on.
It sounded nice.
It was.
Until I stopped walking.
So 3 hours and 4 miles later( us pregos are a slow breed) we get
home....
I can't move.
Note to self: while prego..... Stop before you feel it!
I am going to ho eat a bagel..... Assuming I can lift this large body
out of bed and up those stairs......

....another day....

Okay.
So does it seem that all I do on here is gripe? Well.... If that's the
way you feel than this post won't be any better for you.

How am I right now?
I'm irritated.
Why you ask?
Well i shall tell you...
Gladly...

I'm frustrated with people who offer unwanted advice. Those people who
surely mean well but will tell you "just the way it is/going to be"
because....well you know... That's what happened to them. So why
would you be any different right? Ugh.
I'm so tired of hearing what I should do. What I'm doing wrong. What
will "absolutely" happen... And what won't.
My brain is exhausted.
I am not a prude.
I genuinely want some peoples advice and tips......
But for goodness sake let me ask you for them!
I know it's only the beginning.....
It will only be ten times worse when Jaden is here.....
( and no... I dong know when that is!!! For the last frickin time!!!)

Oooohhhhhh okay.
Better now.
I am not a bitch.
I promise.
Just a mommy-to-be on advice overload.

God created us to be mommies.....
I'm sure I'm not as clueless as people think I am. Really.
Someone recently even asked me if I needed them to show me how to
change a diaper.... Really....

1. Very few girls make it out of their preteens without learning
that...if it even takes till then.

2. I've worked in childcare/ child developement for about 5 or 6
years... You really don't think ive had to change a diaper in that
amount of time.

3.I am just not that dumb!

Another issue I have:

The oh so classic " I'll let you borrow my kids for a day... Then
you'll see what it's really like!"

Okay
1. You notice it's always the parents with the bratty evil children
who ask that?!? To the point where you really want to say.." No... It
won't help.... My children will never be as aweful as yours!"

2. What a cheap way to get a babysitter

3. Like that's any way to really honestly truthfully "see what it's
like"...... No

4. Again,..... Not a dumb ass!

Okay
I'll stop.
Promise to be more pleasant next time.

One less....

Now.... I am down to one other prego I know......
Congrats Cynthia on the baby!
Lindsay..... Your the only one left.

Oh when will it be my turn........ugh

35 days....

35 days till our 2nd doctor appointed due date.
25 days till my first doctors appointed due date.
And about 18 or 19 days till my own.....
So
Slowly
But
Surely
We are getting there.

Progress:
We are almost there with the nursery..... Minus as few last minute
odds and ends... Haha like sheets and such. It's is completely
full... However... With all sorts of of baby odds and ends. More than
the kid will actually need I'm sure.
Artwork now hangs on my sons walls...due to a creative "nesting" thing
I went through last week....( God bless the ppl around me).
Contracting: more frequent....
Along with all sorts of other nasties.
My mom has been here for almost 2 weeks now... Which I am thankful for
because jon has been gone and if left alone I most assuredly would
have gone crazy and burned something down. However..,, she leaves
Wednesday.... And then I'm alone again for most of every day... Which
can be nice. BUT for me it makes the days go by sooooo much slower!!!!
I just want to hold my baby...... That's about as big as my world is
right now.... Baby:)

But for now i try to hold onto some sanity..... What little I have left.
Again....
I am not a patient person!!!!!!!!

Frustration

Fact: We are closer to having our baby in our arms every day

Fact: natural progression is happening, however slow it may be

SUPER ANNOYING FACT: 2 of the 4 currently pregnant women I know had
their babies this last week......

New revelation: I am MUCH less patient than I thought.....

44 days and counting.... But time is not moving quickly!

44 days..... Till the doctors due date that is.....
It's seems close.....
But so far away at the same time....
I'm as ready as I'll ever be for our little bundle......so let's get
the show on the road......

That being said....
My body hs totally changed over the last 2 weeks.... And pregnancy is
a horse of a different color now. No longer are we just growing a
baby.... Now..... We are trying to get it out.,,. And my body is
screaming!
I have less energy than I did in the first tri while I was super sick!
And in turn i feel quite useless as a human being right now.
I hate that.
That's all ....
I want my baby now!
Night

My thoughts for today

I hate contractions!
HATE!
It's been every night this week.....
And they r not the cute little...
"oh look..... My tummy feels hard" contractions.
They freaking hurt!
Yay..... Can't wait till they get worse!!

baby update week 32...( or 33....34...35... Who the hell knows)

Doctors appointment: Monday July 27, 2009 1:00p.m.

Walk in waiting room... See favorite receptionist... Talk to the other
one.
Pay copayment (whoopie....not) and move along to the bathroom to pee
in the cup... A task which women were never meant to do.

Wait..
Wait.....
Wait........

Snobby nurse comes to get me.....
Scale time.... My favorite! ( cough)
GAINED 5 LBS IN TWO WEEKS!!!!
That can't be right?!?!?!?
"water wieght" I'm reassured....
"your puffy"
Well gee thanks I think!
Feeling rather large and complicated we make our way to the room....
Wait....
Blood pressure:ok
Natalie!!! My favorite midwife:)
Smile
Nod
"your much bigger" says she
"it happens" says I
Let's measure....
Eyes pop!!!
"um.... Do u feel like he's dropped?!"
Me:"oh most definately.... Try moving a house with a head between your
legs!"
Laugh
Smile
"well..... He has most definately dropped....A LOT...... It's pretty
early for him to be that low"
Me:" well just maybe....we are not that early ...,, like I've been
saying all along"
Her:" that is most definately a possability!"
Now I enjoy a bit of my " I told u so " moment
Her:" we could definately be having this baby sooner than we thought!"

Doppler: HR 140... Good boy
Runs from the darn thing every time...

Talk peds....alt. Vaccine schedule.... Recommend local naturalpath....
Not a freaky one

My thought for today...

..... My thought for today :

Why must it be so f#%*^%~¥ hot?!?!?

Progress

So...
We are moved.... Officially....
Though there are still many boxes.... Still overflowing with stuff. My
favorite ones being those random boxes that just end up being a giant
junk drawer. They save time in the beginning.... But certainly not
the end!

My mother painted the nursery yesterday...... It's is now a beautiful
shade of Green for our Jaden boy:)
So.... Today I get to start setting up the nursery !!!!! I have felt
so deprived up till now! I knew we would be moving so all that cute
little baby stuff just stayed in boxes and bags till now.

I'm excited

Almost giddy

Let the nesting begin!

Pictures...( well no..... Just picture)

Dad and I up at mount baker comparing bellies:) I am 30 weeks 4 days (or 33 weeks 2 days)

Ahhhhh.......

Have house.....
Have regained some sanity because of it.....
Still pregnant....
Have lost a lot of sanity because of it....
Moving starting Wednesday.....
Paint nursery......( well not ME)
No living in car.....
Have 6-9 weeks leftish of prego belly....
Have another shower soon....
Happy to set up for baby Finally....
Happy now....
Not so much stress.....
I hate moving.....well
I hate packing/ moving out ....
I like unpacking/ moving in....
It's hot....
I'm fat.....
Getting fatter....
And hotter.......
But it's okay.....

Just some thoughts

Moving out of the ghetto...

So it would seem we are taking the monster house.... I am glad about
this.
I am glad for a number of reasons:
1. This no longer means we will have to live out of our car and
scavenge through fast food dumpsters after hours.
2. I am quite sure that the space of a house would be a little more
desirable to jon an I once baby comes..... I would think the car would
get a little cramped.
3. I would no longer have to mow my lawn with a a aweful pushmower
from the 50's.....( on more attempt to be Eco friendly that is NOT
worth it)
4. This would be the first time...( and notice my attempts of this not
sounding aweful of me)......that Jon and I will have lived in a town
that was not (almost) strictly Hispanic. I dont speak Spanish....
It's not a good fit.....gosh I'm from north Idaho...not used to
diversityr. What do you exspect? That by no means suggests that I am
not for diversity...... I most certainly am..... Though it seems the
last few years have been not so diverse and very strictly Hispanic.
Which.... Is only one.
5.everything nicely withing walking distance....aplus for baby and I.
6.this is just one more absolutely possitive way that shows how well
the Lord provides for our needs!

CONS:
1.the packing and moving
2. Further away from our birthplace
3. The packing and moving
4. Still having to scrape for pennies ( yes I know this will never end)
5. The packing and moving

So.......

life....according to a stressaholic

It seems to me that when God wants to throw you a trial......they come in twos or threes.
As of now we have about 13 days to come up with a place to live...and be 100% moved out of our current place. I guess this wouldn't seem like so much if it didn't happen to fall on top of being pregnant. I have to pack in shifts, evidently this pregnancy thing takes your energy or something:P I can only manage an hour or two at a time before i have to go sit down and eat a snack and drink about 5 gallons of water to get myself in working order again.

We have found a possible place in Anacortes....
it looks like a monster from "Where the Wild Things Are"
very 70's but fun too.....a typical coastal beach house. I like the idea of living on the water now.....I know Mount Vernon isn't to far away but it feels like it. Its smaller though.....but i don't think i'll go crazy....burlington is only about 20 minutes away.
We went to look at the place on Sunday.....and met with the current residents AND the landlords. The landlords.....Don and Pinky.....are in their mid 60's i would guess.....and the total grandma and grandpa type. They have already invited us to their farm to pick veggies from the garden and get fresh eggs. They are very cute and seemingly awesome landlords.
Our big problem with house hunting has been our two dogs. All the cheaper places around here are in the college towns.....which means no pets because they dont want the college students to have them. Which i understand....but I would like to think us a little more responsible:P One place we checked out wanted $1000.00 PER pet NONREFUNDABLE deposit. outrageous.
so.....
these people love animals.....and require NO deposites other than security......
we can paint...
we have a garden....
the neighbors are retired nursary owners so the place is brimming with beautiful flowers that I cant kill:P but can still enjoy.....
BUT...
even though this is cheaper than the place we are in now.....
its is not as cheap as we would like....
and will be a stretch for a little while.

so we need to make up our mind....
to take it or not to take it.....
I don't know....
I find myself compairing every other place to this one now.....
but is it worth it?
will it be a mistake if we take it....?
or a mistake if we dont?
Oh Lord help these scatter-brained people!
It may not sound like that big of deal....
but it is.....
and has been
and i would like to not be living in our car when Jaden comes.....
just small things like that worry me...
ugh....
more prayers please!

quick update: no portland as of right now

so yes.....
it has been forever since I have been on here.....

Life has consistantly been crazy.....so i'll try to sum in all up as best and as quickly as i can.
29 1/2 weeks prego (by docs schedule)
Jon did not get the job he was hoping for in Portland....
although there may be another shot.
at this point we are just planning on staying here at least for another year....
BUT...
we still need to find a new place no matter what is happening because we need something cheaper.
yes that does mean i am still unemployed....
and probably will be till after baby.
so......house hunting....
and since it is sooo hard to find a place in this town.....cheap place....thats not ghetto......and where you will not get stabbed while you sleep....we may be moving to Bellingham....
which isn't that far away.....and will not make that much difference in commute time for Jon as our rounds while I was working IN TOWN had us covering about 50 miles a day! In town...thats so dumb.
but.....
we are trying to figure it all out....
we need to tell our current landlord we are leaving by the end of the week.....
so...
no pressure or anything.
did i mention i hate packing........
and that is never having done it while prego.
oh well at least its cool....
so..........
if anyone wants to help..........
feel free:P

okay gotta run....
-Lyss

Update on life.....

I lie here.....
On a normal day I'd be amidst the marathon drivingon I5 right
now.....but no. It would seem I am still, more or less, unemployed.
Though mostly by my own chosing at the moment.
I told my would be boss that I didn't want to harm my good name....
And therefore would not be back until Everything blew over...if at all.
More roomers and more people involved now ....
I just want nothing to do with it.
I am praying for my own little Christmas miracle of Portland opening
up soon...... Which would put us down there theend of July. I know
time crunch...... But a nice new start. Maybe that me just wanting
the easy way out of this mess.
But for now I'm at home..... Not really doing anything..... Just
waiting.....( ya it's totally like a few pages out of dr. Suess' "Oh
the places you'll go"....)
I wait....
There's really nothing I can do at home....
The lawn needs a trim....but alas....we have an old fashion push
mower( the type without a motor) and I surrendered that soully to my
hubby a lot earlier in my pregnancy. I'm weak:)
I suppose I could clean the house.... Again.....
I would be setting up the nursery...... But it's pointless since we
might be moving in a few weeks.
Ugh.....
I feel frustrated and overwhelmed.....so much is happening and there
is literally nothing I can do about any of it. Does that make me sound
like a control freak , well yeah, maybe a little.
Trusting God is hard sometimes.....exspecially in those times you need
to the most.
And so...
Inconclusion....
Prayer is still a nessessity/priority.... And much needed/wanted

Drama...drama...DRAMA

So.... Let me tell y'all a little story.....

It starts a few months ago when my boss.... Who was at the time going
through a divorse...recieved an email. A parent at the daycare had
forwarded it to her because it was ABOUT her. A lovely ( cough) lady,
who is losely connected to my boss family, had circulated a Nasty,
slanderous letter about my boss. It professed that my boss was
turning tricks , dissed her an her family to no end, and blamed a
whole bunch of other things on her. This lady works for the red and
therefore knows a lot if ppl.
Since my boss now had proof, she contacted this ladies employer. (She
had sent these emails out from her work email.... During work hours.)
So my boss informed her boss of what his employee was doing on company
time.... That it was slander.... And that it was hurting her business.
He thanked her.... And we all went on with our life.....
or so we thought!
today after I was off 3 state workers came by to take away our
license. Turns out that lovely lady.... In retaliation for talking to
the boss.... Called the state and told them my boss was on drugs.
So.... Now she must reapply for a license.... And prove she's not on
drugs( which she's not)

Which could
Take months.....

Hence I am currently unemployed.....

Ugh......

Not
Many jobs out there for Very pregnant women!!!!

It's on Gods hands and I'm not worried ...
I do feel bad for my hubby though.....

So hey..... Anyone need a babysitter personal chef/ anything????
Anything. Within reason of course:)

What a happy day....
Not to meantion it's hot.... And I am Prego and miserable!

Prayers are appreciated !!!!
Thanks guys!!!

On the road again.... Finally....

So I'm on the very tippy top of snowqualmie pass right now.... It's a
lovely day.
My hubby is driving like crazy person all the while yelling at the
voice talking to him on his iPhone.
He has become a mark lavin(sp?) junkie lately.
I personally don't care for the guy.
Anyway
We r on our way to Idaho.....
Last time we were there it was to tell everyone we were prego.... So
it's been since January. I am definately ready to go back for a
visit. I miss ppl:(

Lentsch family news:
Baby boy has a name now.... Whoohoo
Twenty three weeks this weekend....( they saystill don't believe em)
Appointment was yesterday and both of us are still measuring large:)
However I was happy when they made
Me step on the scale and I only gained 1 1/2 lbs in a month..... Ahhh
and yet I'm twice as big:) at lease I know it's baby and not fat.

Still no news about the Portland job....
( yes we may move this summer)
We shall see.... Lord willin it will work.

I talked with my midewife and she said there is an awesome midwifery
service down there thatshe knows.... She could set t all up AND they
specialize in water births!! So that will ease my mind to know the
doctor thing won't be an issue.
Okay getting car s idk... Gotta go

The ups and downs....

Ahhh pregnancy..... It's a beautiful/ horrid thing.
My poor body... While never being gorgeous to begin with...... Will
never see better days.....
I'm a hairy, stretch marked, water retaining, aching mess.
But there's a promise of a baby at the end that makes it worth while....
today I am going for a mommy-to-be massage.... A lovely mothers day
present from my wonderful hubby...
Ahhh 4 more more months:)
It still is rather wonderful though... Don't get me wrong.... I just
feel like I've been prego forever now:)
Okay back to work..

Our son.....

Well.... It's a boy .... Most definately a boy... In fact it's one of
the first things the doctor said while looking at him. His other words
included "he's her healthy" "perfect" and " hes a big boy!"
Music to our ears....
I'm thrilled..I knew it ...
Jon is beside himself.....
I love the way he stops and gets teary eyed every time he says the
words "my son".
Thank you Lord!
I just want him now!!

Just two days...

Just 2 ........ 2 days till we (hopefully) find out what baby bob
is:) I can't wait!
I am so not patient!!! I'm glad I don't have to wait till the end....
I would go crazy!
The hospital called today.... They wanted to bump me up 2 hours ...
The receptionist remembers me and laughed when she said she thought
I'd be happy cause she knew I really really want to know:)
So yep....
I hope baby cooperates!!!

A long....Long week!!!

It's Wednesday ......
I am so done! What can't it be Friday already..... ?

My kids have been Horrific(!) this week.... And I have been getting up
at 4am to take jon to work since we are down to one car now. That
leaves me with about 41/2 hours of sleep at night because it takes mr
SO LONG to get comfortable at night now!!! ( thanks baby!)
I'm spent....
The end....(please)

Blogging from email

Does this work?
Let's see....
Send*

Shots.....

So.....
as the baby actually being outside of my tummy is drawing nearer.....
we have to start making the choices that are hard....
one being immunizing. What to do what to do.....
I'll be honest, I do not fully support the whole shot thing......
Oh i think some of them are okay........but there are so many things you are pumping into your babies body.....and i REALLY don't think its that good. How could it be?
I work with children with disabilities every day......and of course i wonder why there seems to be so many children with issues these days.
Most people think that its a paranoid mindset to think it has anything to do with the shots. And i do think that it can be taken to far. But.....I do think it plays a role.
I don't want to do full immunizations.....at least as of now....
I don't know....however....if i want to pick and chose them......
or rule them out all together......
its such a big thing.....
the more i research it though.....the less thrilled i am about it.
Lord help us do what is right.....

Friday, April 24th

Its a beautiful day........but its nap time and i'm stuck inside.
We are going to Yakima tonight for Danielle and matts wedding.....
so we get to see everyone....(its been a while so i'm excited to see my Abby girl)
But i'm also faced with the problem of having nothing to wear! ahhh i know...no biggie right.....i just don't want to look like a slob for the wedding and the people i haven't seen in forever. oh gosh.....why should it even matter:P it shouldn't.....

okay so lets see.....I'll be 19 weeks on sunday......
Baby is a gymnist:P
Midwife told me i was huge:P
I measure 23 so i'm big:P but i knew that already.
Found heartbeat AS SOON as they put the doppler on me....
said baby IS VERY large and healthy.....
which is WONDERFUL ......but i can't help thinking that that huge baby has to come out of me at some point:P .......outch
I have more energy......
but now my belly is RUNNING INTO EVERYTHING!!
small animals can sleep on top of my tummy now....
I can easily rest objects....such as laptops......on my belly with no effort whatsoever:P
Ultrasound is May 6th.....can't wait!
Jons getting so excited....
I told him i've held out on shopping until then,.....then i get to buy SOMETHING!
hehe....
still think its gunna be a boy.....
still dont' know what i want
both
just not at the same time:P
ahhh.....
I actually have been asked by more than a few ppl if i'm having twins......
thanks.....
and even though that would be a possibility......
oh goodness......
ones enough for now thanks
ummmm......
yep....

Pregnancy as of week.....16

I am almost finished with week sixteen...it feels like i should be so much further along. But I think that has to do with having to relive weeks i thought were already over. oh well. we are getting there. It is pretty awesome to think we are almost half way though...

So updates?

I feel my baby now.....that is SO wonderful!! Its so much easier to feel it there than wonder about it all the time. Sometimes its soft and fluttery.....(I'm not sure fluttery is really the way i would explain it.....but its close enough.....its kinda how bubbles feel after you jump into a pool and the bubbles rush along your body to get to the surface) sometimes its harder....and it feels like its scratching my insides:P Oh and he....(NO i don't know its a he....but because of my husband calling it a he.....now i do to)
hates church bells:P it makes him jump every time:P

Our next appointment is april 22.....its at that appointment that we will make the appointment for the ultrasound. He...(Dr. somthingorother) is really easy to get in with usually so i'm hoping its only a few days after our regular checkup!!!!!!!!!!! i can't wait!
So what is it? I don't know. I think i'm more sure with other pregnancies that with my own:P (like for swingrovers for instance......i swore it was a boy:P) I have said from the beginning that it was a girl........but i think i just hold to that because i'm stubborn :P same reason my husband continues to swear its a boy! I say its a girl but it just doesn't sit right.....I don't know.

SO....heres what I'll say: If its a boy i wont be surprised at all.......BUT if its a girl i would be surprised i was right........
I asked jon what he honestly thought it was....all stubborness aside.....he says he really believes it a girl deep down. So i don't know......
it just bothers me that i don't know yet
i don't do well with secrets:P

my belly is getting huge:P I can rest it on counters now......and it seems to catch all my food.
my dog actually can sleep on my belly shelf now.
I feel like I am huge compaired to people who are similar weeks......
but i'm guessing because i'm so short and have a short middle:P baby is going straight out and down:P
I'm just now starting to gain weight though....which is odd because i've gotten so much bigger but haven't gained weight. I lost about 20 lbs at the beginning of the pregnancy and then the baby sucked all the fat out of every part of my body and took it to my tummy. Its SO true that baby changes your body.........but i honestly think i like this way better...as i wasn't to fond of my boyish figure beforeP

I LOVE having a belly.....i cant keep my hands off of it......its comforting just to hold it:P

people are starting to rub my belly now....its a little weird...but kinda fun.

uhm lets see.....baby is the size of an orange now.......at out last appointment its heart rate was 155:P Its very much alive and healthy....praise God:P

anyway i guess i'm done blabbering now.....got work to do...

Pregnancy.....

Okay so i finally found a moment where i'm home, not asleep, and not vomiting. ahhhh relief......at least for now.
Pregnancy so far.....
is terrible and wonderful at the same time. I wouldn't trade it for the world.....but its not so fun all the time:P I know i haven't had it as bad as some i know....but i still feel sorry for myself from time to time. It was such a big physical change that i think i am just now starting to get used to what i can and cant do during pregnancy.....how much energy i have and how long it lasts.
My belly is HUGE....at least i think so......I love stretch pants.
September still seems like a long way away......even though i know it will go by fast.
I can't wait to hold my baby.....

Daddy's getting more exited every day.....hes talking to my tummy on a regular basis now. I love it...its so cute:P

I can't wait to find out what we are having.......ugh that seems like so far away too......
I just want to know.....and to not call it an IT anymore:P

so thats life....
Pregnancy......
its a love/hate relationship....
but i wouldn't trade it for the world......
Its my baby:P

most specifically to jewel

I must say i'm so sorry for dropping off the face of the earth ya'll....
Biblestudy mostly....
I have felt like crap quite honestly.....
and thats why i haven't shown up....
i'm sorry
i'm a bum:)

Okay here goes....

I'm pregnant....PRAISE THE LORD!!!¡¡!!

Still waiting

I know I haven't written much lately ... But with good reason...all in good time my friends

When he sleeps he snores...

I can't sleep and so I'm just laying here...thank goodness for the invention of the iphonesnd mobile blogging aye?
I don't suppose I'm thinking about anything particular....just pondering.
I have spent the last halfan hour or so reading the blog of a recently engaged friend of mine....well she is a friend but I can't say I'm as close to her as those around me are . My own fault I suppose.
But I feel that she is really truely happy...and because of that I am happyfor her.
So it's a new year... With new expectations,letdowns,wants,needs....etc.
I wonder what god has in store for us this year....I can only hope:)

I'm tired....maybe I'll sleep....or try.....

i have so so much to say....but i can't yet!!! I cant!!!!!!!! I will soon i promise!